I believe. I pray. I believe when I pray. I pray what I believe. And sometimes, I just pray for what I know is impossible and maybe, unreasonable. I am going to continue to do that even when it looks futile. But, truthfully, I’m not going to be 100% this way all through life. Historically, I’ve been spiritually way laid intermittently. Falling off the tracks made prayer an exertion and sometimes, an absent piece of my life. Devotion couldn’t describe my prayer connection to Him. But, it completely describes His toward me. The channel is never closed. If there is hindrance, it’s because I introduce it. For 4 weeks, I’ve had prayer block. I was praying, but I was not completely connected. I really wanted to, but I put something else in the primary place in my heart. What I wanted, versus Him. I couldn’t see straight. I couldn’t see with the eyes of my heart, that HE is what I want. I started reading The Real God with a friend. They hoped we could know Him through this book. The first 2 Chapters seemed elementary. I wasn’t moved. But Chapter 3 broke some of that block. I can’t describe it or explain it in any way that could honor Him enough, but He arrived. He made Himself known and His Presence accompanied me that day. (Monday) Yesterday, driving home from work, I found a place to park and I just looked up at His clouds. Even though He had not left me, I felt Him even more. He sent me a message without words. He said His Love is like no other. Whatever I have been looking for on earth I will only ever find in Him. The wants haven’t disappeared, but His Peace helps soften the sharpness. And I can see His Love repairing the brokenness that I just couldn’t heal. It probably won’t be a fast fix. I don’t even know if it will ever be gone. Heart and Soul get invested and it requires Him to help redirect. I did say yesterday that I handed over my Heart and He holds it. None of this happened without outside prayers. I have priceless friends who prayed, and others who also texted, and emailed to help me know how much I was on their heart. I am never alone fighting to stay in sync with Him. He was fighting for me. And He sent the Calvary.
Love Always❤❤❤